I don’t know all the time,
sometimes I just get lost, get lost in the way I feel
for I feel everything real.
Useless, useful, inspiring,inspired a failure here,
guided,misguided most answers unclear.
Everything still seems foggy behind my eyes but yet I walk on by.
Motivated and motivating,
old,youthful yet childish still, I am everywhere and nowhere at all In what just seems a moment,filled.
Powerful and powerless, an inability to be false.
Wanting, needing, yearning for one other to admit to it.
Admit that their fears and failures ignite them to live so deeply,
so deeply in the moment that they forget everything else, if but for jus an instant.
In that instant I hope you find the way, find the way back to you.
Back home again, to that place in you,
the place that’s true!
I just spent what felt like a nanosecond with you, but my watch tells
me it was 3 hours.
I am consumed with wanting to know more. Wanting to know you.
Who are you? Why do you feel like me? Little things you say feel like me.
It is like home stood in front of me just now, except this time it
hugged back as tightly as do.
Neither of us flinched when we said the hard things – the moments that
were at once so painful, but now are simply memories we have learned
to live with – that have made us stronger because we got through.
You stood so still.
You tugged at your beard a few times – I wonder what that little
action means? Were you fidgeting? Thinking? Nervous? Or was it just
something you reflexively do without a reason – like how I tuck my
hair behind my ears sometimes.
I listened as hard as I always do, when I am keenly aware someone is
letting me in to a slice of their life. It always feels like such a
gift. With you, though, there was something more.
You let me just listen.
So many people think I am so loud and outgoing they don’t let me just
listen. Did you know I just wanted to listen to you? Not just listen.
That’s wrong. Really hear you.
Hear not only the words and memories and piece together little bits of
who you are, but how your voice modulates, too. The tone. The
patterns. The way your voice gets deeper when you relax a bit.
And you gave me the time to notice that. And how you didn’t once ask
to sit down, and we stood as if no other people were around – though I
am sure they were.
I don’t know how, but I want to give you the same gift you just gave
me. For the first time in a very long time I felt like I took a deep
A true, honest, deep breath.
Let me be your inhale.